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Grocery Shopping: 101

  • My daughter takes the time to clip coupons for me to take to the grocery store. And I do. And I bring all of them back home in my purse.
  • I never use the anti-bacterial wipes on the handle of my cart. Then I regret it and obsess the entire time I shop. I visualize a super dirty person pushing this cart before me. And I wonder… Are my hands on toddler spit?
  • I’ll never buy a “corn reject” …an ear of corn where you cancorn husk
    see that somebody else peeled back the husk a little and
    didn’t choose it.
  • I’ll always think homemade cookies for $3.99 are a deal, but any healthy food over $2.50 is a rip-off.
  • If I don’t find a dozen good eggs (without cracks) after a couple of peeks, I open them up and shuffle them around like I’m racking billiard balls until I get 12 good ones.
  • dog foodWhen I lift a large bag of dog food I “toss it” into my cart, so it looks like I’m super strong.
  • I eat the samples and pretend I’m going to buy the product… look at the box, smile, nod my head, make yum-yum noises and tell the lady it’s delicious. Then I awkwardly walk away. Ashamed. But the shame goes away once I round the corner into the aisle.
  • And… when I get back to my car, I find my shopping list on the passenger seat.  🙂

12 thoughts on “Grocery Shopping: 101”

  2. I am with you on coupons. I’m very good at taking them on an extensive journey of the store, and even buy the things I’ve got coupons for. Rarely do I remember them at the register.
    I have good luck with eggs.
    I have never thrown my dog food. If I did that, I’d probably break something, cause a commotion, and everyone would stare at me, the coupon-waster.

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  3. I didn’t know I was supposed to act interested in supposedly purchasing the product I was sampling, Debbie! I thought that was the metaphorical Swag Bag to get me into Wegmans instead of Price Chopper! 😉

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    1. When I was 16 years old, I was the “cheese lady” at Wegmans. I had to demo all these wonderful cheese dishes they had me make (I guess I could cook back then). It made me feel good if I thought the people might buy a slab of jarlsberg…or at least said “This is sooooo delicious!”

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      1. If you were 16, you were the cheese girl, Debbie. Just saying. I don’t think there’s been a 16 year old yet who can sell Jarlsberg. Cheez Whiz, American, Cheddar, Provolone, tops.

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  4. Confessions from the Grocery Aisle.

    I rarely – RARELY – try samples and I will scoot away from those demo areas as quickly as I can. I’m still traumatized by the woman I saw one day in Costco who – after sampling something – proceeded to remove her teeth and clean them with the hem of her shirt. I can’t unsee that.

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